Here is my next resolution:
Sounds easy, doesn't it? But for me it's enormously difficult. I might have a little bit of a control issue. I know, though, that trying to control everything just makes me miserable.
Because the truth is, we're never in control. If I can let go of expectations, my need for things to go a certain way, and anything that bothers or worries me but that I can't change, it will free up a ton of energy and make me a whole lot happier.
This is something I've been contemplating for a while; below is a post I wrote about it back in August of 2017!
"The Power of Letting Go"
Recently in my yin yoga class, my teacher read the poem below to us. I felt that instant electric surge of recognition. The entire poem rings so true for me; see what you think:
“She Let Go”
She let go.
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of the fear.
She let go of the judgments.
She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head.
She let go of the committee of indecision within her.
She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons.
Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice.
She didn’t read a book on how to let go.
She didn’t search the scriptures.
She just let go.
She let go of all of the memories that held her back.
She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward.
She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go.
She didn’t journal about it.
She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer.
She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper.
She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope.
She just let go.
She didn’t analyze whether she should let go.
She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter.
She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment.
She didn’t call the prayer line.
She didn’t utter one word.
She just let go.
No one was around when it happened.
There was no applause or congratulations.
No one thanked her or praised her.
No one noticed a thing.
Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort.
There was no struggle.
It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad.
It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be.
A small smile came over her face.
A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore…
by Rev. Safire Rose (as posted on Elephant Journal)
I get goosebumps every time I read it. Every line is what blogger Keri Wilt of FHB&Me calls a “head bob moment”—yep, that’s me! “The committee of indecision”—oh yeah, I’ve got them! “She didn’t read a book on how to let go”—ha! I can’t tell you how many books I’ve read on pretty much that subject. What, I can just do it without someone telling me how? What a radical, extraordinary concept! And oh, the planning … and the talking about it, and the analysis of pros and cons … that is me all over.
Every time I read those last few lines, I can glimpse the peace that’s available to us if we can actually let go of everything that doesn’t serve us. I can imagine that light, joy-full feeling of truly letting go, and I want it!
I find that I am holding on to quite a few things that are blocking my path to joy. Here are some I could let go of that would really lighten my load:
· Needing to be perfect/not letting myself make mistakes
· Needing to always be in control
· Needing the house to be perfectly neat all the time
· Needing to be right in arguments—there’s that saying, would you rather be right or happy? Must. Remember. That.
· Agonizing about mistakes I made and embarrassing moments from my past
· Worrying about any future event that may or may not happen
· Worrying about anything that is out of my control
· Self-consciousness and caring about others’ opinions of me
· Wondering why I seem to be the only person in the house who can change the toilet paper roll or put clean dishes up. Just kidding---sort of! But there is truth at the heart of this: I can let go of the irritation I feel about these issues, and other ones that are really not worth getting upset over. So much energy wasted on the small stuff!
Is there something—or are there many somethings—that you could let go of? You can always grab them again if it turns out you need them! But perhaps you could experiment with letting go of one need or expectation or fear, and see what happens. I will be doing my very best to let go just like “she” did, and I hope you are able to do the same!